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But in this situation, my initial reaction was hostility.
She didn’t trust me enough to tell me this in person.
As my other female friendships began to wither, she remained.
To me, it seemed like it was a sign from God to continue investing in her.
I attempted to mitigate the awkwardness by responding in a courteous manner and pretending it wasn’t a big deal, but it was clear that I couldn’t view her the same way anymore.
Our friendship suffered a quiet collapse as a result.
Do I project my negative experiences on women to expect and avoid disappointment?
I was nice to every girl I met and expected the same in return.
Instead, I had to read through long messages where she dumped everything on me at once and expected me to just accept it with grace.
I knew what was coming and I figured that she wouldn’t be direct enough to say it.
Maybe I could have been more upfront with my feelings for her and risk rejection for peace of mind.
Maybe I could have shown brotherly love by supporting her new relationship.
As far as I knew, they all hated me and so I hated them back in return. This very conflict led me to reflect on my previous female friendships and ask some difficult questions.