Dating a guy with 2 kids intimatedating com
(He had decided to leave her, but she 'accidentally' got pregnant, so he stuck around for as long as he could.)It was a lot of effort for someone who didn't bring much to the relationship beyond a lot of insecurity driven and ex related drama, and was mostly only free during the week after work (at his worst) because he spent every weekend with his daughter.
Every situation is different, but I wouldn't do it again.
The really hard thing is knowing where you fit in the hierarchy of things. I wouldn't trade the last fifteen years of my time with her daughters for anything.
I see a lot of comments in this thread saying no way, she can't put me first, etc etc.... Those kids are my first priority too, and their mother and I worked together to ensure that it stayed that way for both of us. They've all three grown up to be pretty remarkable young women, which is at least partly my doing..their mother is an AWESOME woman.
It'll definitely make you grow up in a hurry, at the very least.
You'll also learn that people with kids tend to hang out with other people that have kids, so the people you spend time with will change over time.
Maybe if circumstances were different, it would've worked out (there was some other drama going on with her ex-husband at the time).
I'm dating somebody right now, but if my current girl and I were to break up, I wouldn't discount another woman just on the basis of her offspring. You have to decide if you are ready for the responsibility of a kid first (and it is a lot).
That pretty much would eliminate over half my dating pool. My only problem was that, with a 2 year-old son, she really couldn't see me for more than a couple hours a week, and that really wasn't enough for me. I understood that her son needs to come first, and she understood that the relationship didn't really leave much room for me.
I have a friend who fell in love with a woman's child when he first met and they are married and happy.
Other friends have met kids and it hasn't clicked.
Provided that my ex is mentally stable, I would still allow my kids to have a relationship with them. She brought with her 3 of the most beautiful little girls that I had the privilege of being a step-dad to.
I didn't have kids of my own, but I always wanted them.